Family Focus Part 2 | Wednesday Night Service

All right. Well, good evening everyone. We are so excited to be back again for the second installment of Family focused Wednesday night takeover, hosted by us and the green shirts, the Young Families Ministry. How many of you guys were here last week and enjoyed last week's service? So good.

We're just so humbled and honored at the way that the Lord showed up last week as the Benton shared their testimony and shared truth and declared truth. Guys, he is so good and we are just so blessed to be a part of a church that puts such an emphasis on bringing freedom to the families of the refuge. It is freedom. It's for freedom. We've been set free.

So a couple thoughts before we jump in. By the way, I'm Andrew, this is my wife Samantha. For the recording, for those who are healers later on the Young Families Ministry, we have some leaders that actually will join us in just a few minutes. Can you put that slide up of the leaders of the Young Families Ministry? Some incredible folks here on the front row to my right.

Your left. Ooh, that was your mic. I'm trying to get situated. So we actually have had such a great time. Year number one was 20, 24.

Year number two, we're in it right now. The mission statement for the Young Families ministry, to see marriages and families thrive through biblical instruction, practical guidance like changing diapers and discipline and life giving relationships that we all need. We have rooted all this in Colossians 2, 6 and 7. And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. That's a big word.

There must be. Let your roots grow down into him and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth and you were taught and you will overflow with thankfulness. So the shirts we're wearing tonight, you guys, they have a slide for the shirts as well. If you would like a shirt, they are available.

I think they're on that side of the auditorium over there as you leave. If you'd like to have one, you can. They are available tonight for purchase if you want to get one. But we wanted to make sure that we let everybody know tonight. We have some very important topics, but we will get to that in a second.

Young family life changes all the time. And at a drop of a hat, things can shift, things can pivot. So the best way to stay connected is through the QR code that's on the screen. If you want to get texts or emails or any of that stuff, I will tell all of you guys right now. Tonight, there's going to be the opportunity for a pretty good amount of QR code snapping tonight based on resources ministry that wants to resource you.

So yes, we also want to put paper copies in your hands as well. So if you'd rather have that, you can send us an email at the end. There's an email for that, but you can also do it right on your phone as we go through the message tonight. There's a lot of detail for it. So.

But all that said, we have a few things we want to go over and Sam's going to take us through some of the details about tonight's topics. Well, speaking of families, I feel like it's a good time to talk about just that. The joys, the highs, the lows, the good moments, the not so wonderful moments, the exciting times and the harder days of raising families. You know that good old saying that the days are long but the years are short. Some would argue in the middle of life's most demanding season that you see nothing short about what you're walking through.

But be encouraged, friends. They really do grow up so dang fast. Honestly, don't talk to me about them growing up fast. I have cried so many times this past week as I have sat through awards nights for sports that have come to an end recital for a year of dance gymnastic rec meets to show off all the skills and talents that they've learned. And tomorrow, the biggest tear jerker of all, kindergarten graduation.

I am physically unwell. Your friend will not be well, but we will get through it together. Family is so important to the heart of God. He created it. Family was birthed by his design.

Parents and grandparents, children, uncles, aunts, cousins. It's all beautiful and wonderful and it really is a gift to be a part of a family. Yes, it is. But not every day is rainbows and butterflies with birds chirping in the trees. Some days are hard and our children exhaust us in every way imaginable.

Some days you're yelling at your kids to just smile for the picture that eventually will mean something to them. Yep. Let's take this morning for example. I was trying to capture the last day of school. You know that moment where they're holding the sign and they're standing on the front porch and you go back and you look at the first day of school versus the last day of school.

Said sweet daughter was standing, holding her sign, adjusting her hair, getting ready to smile so pretty when said older brother opened the front door that she was leaning against. That caused the sweet daughter to fall into the house. The war started. He wanted to make me fall. It's his fault.

It's not an accident. He was trying to hurt me. And of course, the older son claims he would never cause his younger sister such pain. And I kept reminding them, I just want one picture to document the day. Please stop arguing and just smile so I can look back at this day and remember just how much you've grown.

Other days, our kids act like angelic beings with no flaws. Which days are those? You know, those moments when they're all playing nicely with one another using their imagination, Whether it's with an intense board game outside, getting dirty and using sticks as imaginary swords to fight battles, or cuddled up all in one bed because they just want to sleep together. Life can be hard. And honestly, kids are sometimes just weird.

Some days you find your. You find parenting is really like the saying, brushing your teeth while eating Oreos. Yes, we are all just trying to race raise decent human beings that love the Lord and have an impact in making this world a better place. True. While we are having this deep and meaningful conversation about family, I just feel like there's some characteristics but within the family unit that we need to discuss some typical behaviors that you'll see from children based upon where they fall in the family line concerning birth order.

Let's talk about the oldest children. I am an oldest child. Those sweet, responsible oldest children, the ones that aim to please and hate to disappoint. They do what is asked of them many times before even being told. They're nurturers and care well for each member of their family.

They're respectful and ones you can always count on. Now, those middles, the ones for a brief moment of time, were the baby of the family. They got the special treatment that the babies now have until their time came to a very quick end. They often feel lost in the shovel and even overlooked. They can have a harder time finding their place in the family and even be known as the wild middles.

It's not their fault, though, because the oldest steal the show and the youngest, well, their treatment's just different. Now to talk about those youngest, the babies, the babies of the family always hate to say it or even admit it. They really do have special privileges that no one else will get because they're our baby. Oh, boy. I don't even think Micah put his shoes on by himself until six months ago, where every other kid was like, you know how to put your shoes on?

And he'd come to me and be like, I can't do It. And I'm like, honey, it's okay. I'll help you. This is what not to do. By the way, just as a heads up, we as parents savor the last of each season because our youngest with our youngest, no one is coming after them.

They at times receive more attention and affection because there are babies. The punishment will never be as strong as the other children because there are babies. And the amount that we expect from them will be less because they're our babies. And now that we have clearly defined the true characteristics within the family unit, I would like for you to turn your attention to the screen for. For further explanation of the joys and wonder of this journey that we're all in together called parenting.

Roll the tape.

Hey, Cody, can you go rake the leaves in the front yard? Yeah, dad, I can go do that. I pretty much always say yes. I mean, if you think about, like, all the things he does for our family, it's like. It's like the least I could do, you know, just be willing.

Oh, and Spencer, can you take the trashes out front, please? Yeah, sure. Yeah. There's not a chance I'm doing that. Typically, I say yes, and then he either forgets or does it himself.

And then. Ryan, will you go feed the chickens and bring the eggs in? I'm not doing that. I'm doing a puzzle. If you want someone to do it, do it yourself.

Or have one of them do it. That kid scares me.

So this is love so this is love so this is what makes life.

I'm all aglow and now I know and now I know.

Want the rest of my pizza? Seriously? Yeah. I had an extra peach. You want it?

Yeah.

Tonight the music seems so loud I wish that we could lose this crowd Maybe it's better this way. We'd hurt each other with.

Coming back to me.

Hot and dangerous if you're one of us then roll with us. Cause we make the hipsters fall in love when we got our hot pants on and up and yes, of course we does we run in this town just like a club and no, you don't want to mess with us.

Can anybody relate to this?

Oh, my gosh, all of it. So relatable. I was the kid with the pizza box. I was the one getting punked all the time. That was me.

I was the oldest of. You know, I just always do what is asked of me because he, you know, our kid, Our parents do so much. And that was my childhood. She's the oldest of three girls. I'm the youngest of Three boys.

So when we met each other, it was a little different. We had to blend. We had to blend. It took a little bit of time and a whole lot of apologies. So tonight we are joined with some of our phenomenal young families leadership.

To my left and your right, we have Taylor and Stephanie Brown. Give it up to Taylor and Stephanie. And to my right, we have Naomi and Gianciano. Welcome, you guys.

So we have a slide for this tonight. What are we talking about? We are talking about. Here we go. Screen time management, online safety, blended families, blended grandparents, biblical roles and boundaries within a family dynamic and a big one.

Discussing sexuality, gender, LGBTQ influence from a biblical worldview. So from a parental perspective, I don't. If you have young kids in the room, I won't say anything we're going to say is necessarily awkward, but it may be a good idea at this point for just parental discretion. There will not be any graphic material, but we are going to talk about the facts because this is supposed to equip parents. So as a heads up before we jump in too deep, I want to go ahead and let you guys know some of the details.

So tonight we are going to start with some questions, but before we do that, we want to get to know these folks. I know that Taylor and Stephanie Brown know pretty much everybody in the church at this point, but why don't you guys take a couple of minutes to introduce yourselves. First of all, how long you've been married, tell us about your family and then how you found the refuge. Yep. Thank you, Andrew.

And thank you guys for letting us talk tonight. Pastor jml, thank you guys so much. Yes. Give it up to Pastor jml. We love you guys.

So Stephanie and I have been married almost 14 years. We have three kids. Finding the refuge was kind of its own God story. Long story short, though, Andrew and Sam invited us many years ago, seven years ago. But to give a little context, we talked for years and prayed, just asking the Lord for a spirit filled church.

We were hungry to learn, like, what does it mean to actually walk out the Lord's prayer of let your kingdom come, let your will be done. And specifically wanted to grow in hearing the Lord's voice. So we had used a lot of verbiage of man. We want to be a part of just some kingdom minded people, kingdom citizens. Well, the first Sunday we walked in here seven years ago, they were going through a sermon series and right there there was a banner that said kingdom.

Right here there was a banner that said citizens. We were like, all right, Lord, we're hearing you. And there are many other God stories along the way, but really just solidified that this is our home where the Lord has us. Praise God. That's great.

Well, how many kids you got? Three. Three? What are their ages? We have 11, 10, and an 18 month old.

Hallelujah. Praise God. Love that. All right, Keanu's, tell us a little bit about your family, how long you've been married and how you guys came to find the Refuge.

Are you on? Is your microphone on? Gian? There we go. All right.

Hallelujah. There we go. We made it. Excited to introduce ourselves. So I'm Gian.

This is my wife, Naomi Kihano. I am the husband who needs notes. Hallelujah. Judge away. No worries.

I really wanted to kick this off and just say I have an amazing wife. We've been married now for 10 years. We have almost 10. Feels a little longer sometimes, but it's good in a good way. And then we have four amazing kids.

So we have a 12 year old son named Milo, an 8 year old daughter Luna, 5 year old daughter Rayma, and then a 3 year old named Ira. And we actually relocated from Southern California about two years ago now. So we're almost at our two year anniversary at the Refuge and we're super stoked to be here. This church has really been a godsend for our family. And my wife and I, before we decided to like take the long trip, we bought one way tickets, drove across the country.

We really prayed and asked God to take us to a church that felt like home. And honestly, the moment we walked in, we felt that. And we've honestly been coming to every service every day since our first Sunday here. So excited to be here. All right, Praise God.

Okay. Well, we're so honored that we have such fantastic leadership team within the Young families ministry. Diving right into the content of the night. Steph and Taylor, you guys had very different upbringings concerning the church and developing a biblical worldview on sexuality and culture. Can you guys tell us a little bit how that differed for both of you?

Yeah, I'll start. So I grew up in the church, started following Jesus at a young age. Definitely wasn't perfect in any shape, way or form, but with that, just grew up in a home that just prioritized the Lord. Now, as far as developing a worldview on sexuality and culture, I grew up in the heart of purity culture. Hallelujah.

Who else? Yeah. If anybody can relate. Yes. So sex is bad until marriage.

I kiss dating goodbye. Books were handed out like candy on Easter like court, it's courtship. It's not dating. And if you don't do it this way, then you're doing it wrong. Like, that was.

That's where I grew up. But with that, honestly, looking back, there's some things I'm thankful for. There are pros and cons with it. I'm thankful that Stephanie was the first girl I dated. I'm thankful that with that, my parents encouraged me growing up to have relationships with guys and girls.

But they just told me, like, you know, it may be wise to wait to start dating until you can get married in a few years. Now, one thing that we're doing differently, though, is how we approach discussing sex and sexuality with our kids. For me, I remember the. The talk, the sex talk being one question, and that was, do you know about sex? My answer was yes.

And then I was told, just don't do it. And I said, okay.

So that's a little my story, but go ahead, babe. Yeah, mine is very different, but I grew up going to to in Assemblies of God church, but never truly understood deep relationship with Jesus. I was lukewarm at best until I gave my life back to the Lord later. That said, I was never really taught about sex or sexuality. Unfortunately, I learned a lot through exposure from a very young age.

And when you do not have proper boundaries or even basic rules rules in place, you end up going down the wrong path quickly. So now I can say, as a mom, I desire to show my kids and tell them the importance of biblical sexuality and putting appropriate boundaries and rules in place for them with the understanding of what God says about these things. Amen. Amen. Okay.

Keanu's we are going to go straight to you guys. You guys have a blended family, so you're going to tell us about that a little bit. How have you two come to an agreement on biblical values within your own blended family, and which boundaries have been the most contested by outside influence? I guess I'll start. So we basically came to an agreement through trial and error.

I will preface that every blended family is different. The dynamic of your blended family is going to be different than the dynamic of our blended family. And so for us, the first thing we really did was we had to seek out wisdom. Gian came from a family that was already blended, and so he kind of had an idea of what this structure would look like. I didn't come from a blended family, so I felt like there was a lot of rebuttal when we did get married, because the only format that we had was the Only model was the family that he came from.

And there were just, honestly, a lot of things that I wasn't comfortable with. And so we really did have to remove the outside influences and we had to sit down and have an honest conversation of what do we want this family to look like? How do we want this family to be founded? Because when you get married, scripturally, you leave and you cleave, meaning your immediate family is now your husband and your wife. Your parents, your in laws are extended family.

And there is now a boundary line of their input on your family. I came from a Hispanic family where I. We were together all the time. And so even that learning those boundaries of I told my mom everything. And so the boundary line of respect, I think, in figuring out, how do you do this blended family marriage, because marriage alone is hard, let alone having a third party, basically kind of have a say in how you're raising a child.

And so I would say those were kind of the first things that we really had to come to an agreement on. And we really had to seek wisdom from people that were not our family, people that did not have. We weren't blood, they didn't have an emotional connection to the dynamic of our marriage and our family. And they really were wise, the fruit of their lives, the fruit of their families were something that we were drawn to. And so I would say that, yeah, ditto.

And first and foremost, I think what she said when she prefaced it is that every family situation is going to look different. You know, we're here 10 years in, and the first couple, to be honest, was very hard. The first, I'd say four or five years were pretty tough. And so, you know, we're here. Not polished, not crazy put together, but we're making it work.

And we're learning by trial and error. And we're really honest enough with ourselves to know that we don't have all the answers and that we're actively looking for wisdom. And to her point, it was looking for people that have the fruit, right? Looking at families and asking like, hey, how are they doing it? And being open enough to and being humble enough to ask for advice, I think that's like a huge unlock.

And especially as a man and, you know, I had my son prior to us being married. And so a lot of that came with some shame, a lot of crazy testimony story that is, you know, not for tonight. But what it really meant was, you know, I had the opportunity to kind of start fresh. God blessed me with an amazing wife. And it was our Responsibility to, yeah, you know, leave and cleave on my own, but also bring my wife along and figure out what do we want God's story for us to look like and how do we be like radically obedient to that ask?

Well, we're so grateful for you guys and the wealth of knowledge that you guys have and bring to so many different families that might be raising their family with blended families. So we're just so grateful for you guys being vulnerable and honest. I know there's a lot of you in here that have already raised your children, but for the, the families in here that are raising our children, this day and age is scary concerning the things that are being broadcast and told to our children all the time. So Taylor and Steph, you guys have a 10 year old and a 12 year old. How have you prepared and approached the topic of sexuality, gender and God's design for intimacy within your family for your children?

Yeah, great question. So with this, I'll say two things on the front end. First off, our daughter, who's almost 12, so we started talking about this and researching this like eight, nine years ago. And with that, both Stephanie and I desired to change that generational narrative for us and what that would look like for our family. But I will be very quick to say to give honor to Stephanie with this.

She led the way early on to start thinking about this and talking about this. At that young of an age of where our kids were, she was researching how and when do we have these conversations with our kids. So a couple resources that I'll share that she found that we've used with our kids as we've had conversations with them. And I think we have a slide for this. So it's three resources I think on the slide.

One of them is God's Design for Sex in that series. So this. Yep. So we've just done two of these so far and with these they actually walk you through, like how do you have the conversation with your kids and the stages of having those conversations with your kids. We've looked at or and talked through the I said no book.

Now this is a great book that talks about boundaries, how do you establish those with your kids? And healthy boundaries real quick. They talk about red flag scenarios and green flag scenarios, like what does that look like for your kids? And then good pictures, bad pictures, junior. So this one is a very good age appropriate resource to talk about pornography.

And what does that look like? What does it mean actually defining those things for your seven year old, eight year old, nine year Old, like actually having those conversations with them at a young age, because it's everywhere. So one thing I'll say too is that all these resources for us were extremely helpful. But we submitted all of them to the Holy Spirit before walking through any of these with our kids. So all of these are designed to be almost like picture books that you walk through your kids through.

Now, none of it's explicit or anything like that, but while we were reading through it ahead of time and praying over it and considering it, we were like, you know what? We're not going to do this as a picture book. Yeah, that's just what we felt like, the Holy Spirit leading us. And then we were like, yeah, that page. We're going to skip that one.

And we're just going to keep going because for us, we're praying through. All right, what do we share and when do we share with these kids? And it's going to be different for each of them. But I'm just so thankful for how the Holy Spirit has led us and walking through all those conversations. Praise God.

Yes. So we prayed a lot. We. Even before we had the talk with our oldest. I think I fasted for a couple weeks.

I was so terrified. Fear and trembling. Yes, yes. But it actually, if you go into it and you're not weird, it won't be weird. But we had this strong conviction to tell our kids all about these topics as the foundation rather than letting someone else be the one to tell them about it.

Yeah, they will hear about it in other places. And that's why we started the conversation so young.

We talk to them regularly about God's design for them and remind them of who they are in Christ, even when they're really little. Something as simple as God created you to be such an amazing boy, or God created you to be such a creative girl. Really emphasizing the boy and girl. Absolutely. And we never gave their private parts silly names.

I'm sorry if some of you do that, but don't do that. Tell the truth.

We use proper anatomy and we do that even now with our 18 month old. It just will allow the conversation to be a lot easier. So you're not tripping over those words. And truly, it's just part of your body and sex is everywhere and we have to be the ones to tell our kids about it. From walking in a store to seeing a billboard to people on the beach not wearing enough of a bathing suit.

Poor tint at a bathing suit. Yes. Our kids are not idiots and they're not blind. So we need to address these situations. Yeah.

Another resource I found and used is the birds and bees course. And I think we have a slide for that QR code. I highly recommend this scan that QR code. They talk about a drip method, which has been a game changer. Everyday conversations here and there that begin to build and then being a safe place for your kids so that they can come to you and talk to you freely if they have questions or even if they saw something.

So just one quick thing to add to that, and Stephanie alluded to it beforehand, is in being a safe place is not freaking out over the conversation yourself. Yeah, yeah. Like, and this is where just walking in the power of the Holy Spirit, like, he will help you with this. Because if you are freaking out and they can tell you're freaking out, like, they're not going to come to you. Like, now we're all freaking out.

But it's one. Yeah, exactly. But it's just one of those. Yeah, go ahead. We have a saying, be a duck.

And it's, you know, a duck is paddling like crazy underneath the water, but very calm on top. So you're. You're going crazy inside, but you're calm. Yes. On the outside.

Be cool on the surface. Yeah. And lastly, we. This is just our own conviction, but I do recommend it. We made it very, very clear to our kids when we were having these discussions that this is a mommy and daddy conversation.

This isn't something that they talk to friends about because their friends, parents need to talk to them about it. And no adult should be talking to them about it either. And so obviously, schools. School age is a little different, but you get what I'm trying to say. I do.

I do. Thank you, guys. I saw many hands go up with a phone for the QR code. Does a QR code work? It does not work well.

See how good my handiwork is? That was really helpful. Just go to the website. You can just go to the website. Stephanie's also followed their Instagram.

I will send out an email. And that's been really good, too. So I'm 0 for 1. So there you go. We're doing great.

Keanu's okay. You mentioned the blended family piece of it. You mentioned some of the outside influence piece. So here's a question. Spiritual role clarity.

This is a big one. I think we're living in a society right now where people don't know how to lead, people don't know what to do. So spiritual role clarity in marriages, it has become more and more blurry. As biblical illiteracy runs completely rampant in society. So what roles and responsibilities were modeled for you guys?

And have you had to make any shifts in your own marriage to come into alignment with scripture? In other words, you got taught something bad, read something good, had to make a change. We had to start from scratch and throw the whole thing out. Through the whole thing. I came from a family where I kind of felt it was like a role reversal.

So my mom was always the breadwinner, she was always the spiritual leader in the home. Even though my dad was a pastor who didn't like people. Yes, they are out there, they do exist. So I came from a very confused, like I never saw my parents really argue. I mean, my dad hardly ever talked.

And so I always, it was always my mom taking initiative in doing everything. And so when that's modeled to you, that's what you assume is normal. So I brought that into the marriage where it was like, you can sit back and just hang out, I'll just do whatever needs to be done. And again, he came from a different family structure. I think family of origin really plays key to this in how you come together and you collaborate.

And again, setting the foundation for what you want your family to be. I will say for the shifts that we had to make, there's something that we, I guess a saying that we kind of live by in our house and it's confession, repentance and accountability cannot come without community in everything that we do. Confessing for us. Whether that was my insecurity, whether it was, you know, again, my dad didn't talk, so that's what I grabbed. So anytime there was a conflict when it came to dealing with, with Milo's mom, I would just shut down.

And so there was no conversation until he's so sweet and he wants to settle arguments quickly, which I think is a great attribute. But also I'm Hispanic, so I have jalapenos in my blood. And so si me toque I, you know, and so when you poke at that, I would explode. And I know it doesn't look like it, but I am very much. I know I'm five foot nothing, but still the anger would come out and we just, we made it a non negotiable in our, in our home that we would confess that we would repent and that we would hold each other accountable.

But that could not be done without community. And so we got into a marriage, small group early on in our marriage. And I will tell you, it completely transformed our marriage because it gave us the Freedom to ask the questions that we were so afraid to ask. Sometimes you just need, you just need permission. Sometimes there are awkward conversations that have to be had and unless somebody gives you the freedom to do that, you're not going to ask the question.

And so for us that was monumental. It was foundational in our marriage because we would go to small group and they would have really hard questions and the car ride home would be really awkward. But then we adjusted to just embracing awkward conversation. I think in our family we have something called there's no such thing as tmi because I think that when things go unspoken, that's when things go unhealed. And so when you begin to uncover these things that their hurts or their patterns or habits or rhythms that came down generationally, when you don't openly have a conversation with that, you're giving no room for the holy spirit to heal that.

And all you're doing is you're just receiving, recycling all the old stuff that you're not paying attention to because it's just what you were conformed to. And so for us there was a lot of pushback from I wouldn't say my family more his family, you know, and those conversations, those were things that I had to have a face to face conversation with my mother in law and say we are not doing things things the way that you have done them in your family and I apologize. But this is our family and that's very hard. Now I feel like we have a great relationship and we've had multiple conversations but really it really, it takes vulnerability and it takes a lot of uncomfortable situations, a lot of my own insecurity that I had to really just outright confess to my husband. And so in that kind of cycle, I feel like that's where we really got breakthrough.

Wow. And I, I think too and not like our in laws are the devils, like they all have well meaning intentions and a lot of it is coming from a place of like learn from our mistakes. And it's like, oh, we actually have to make our own mistakes and we have to do things what's best for our family. So I just, I love the wisdom that you bring in that and I love too that you say that nothing is tmi. I think that we have a tendency, me and Steph, we relate on that because we're like over sharers.

And that was just something that I'm like, yes, finally that somebody that just overshares. Another thing I wanted to add that for us is something that we stand by is we don't Take criticism from people that we wouldn't take advice from. Oh, that's good. It's good. I'm gonna say that again, because it got quiet.

Don't take criticism from people you wouldn't take advice from or even wisdom from on their best day. I really had to learn early on, because I'm a recovering people pleaser, that I did have to have a boldness in sticking up for what we wanted for our family. But if I'm being honest, I think I had a lot of times where offense took root in my heart because I was trying to please people, and people were giving, you know, criticism, and it was just wearing me down. And then at the end of the day, I'm like, you don't even have any fruit in your life. I don't want a marriage like yours.

I don't want a family like yours. Why am I listening to anything that you're saying? And so, for us, if somebody gives a criticism and it's like, I wouldn't take advice from you, so your criticism, it kind of just rolls off my back. And I. I think, you know, the devil is after marriages and families, and I think that you have to protect your marriage first and foremost at all cost, because, you know, the devil can sometimes even use our own kids to cause a division and to cause a tension. And if you're not on guard, he's going to have a heyday with your family.

And so I would just encourage you, be cautious with who you take criticism from. Be cautious who you take wisdom from, because those seeds will grow. Wow. All right. Well, we all know that, unfortunately, June is not labeled as Pride Month, and it's going to be in our faces.

It's going to be on cereal boxes. Mickey will be, you know, colored in his rainbow as the LGBTQ culture is ballooning and tries to provide a sexual answer to internal emotional conflict of feeling confused and unwanted. Taylor and Steph, can you guys let us know how you guys have navigated these conversations with gender ideology and has it come up in your household? Yes. No.

It has come up. And one thing I'll say on the front end is because we had those other conversations we just talked about, because we had those at the age that we did with our kids at, I think a lot of people would say at a young age with that, it made these conversations a lot easier.

So with those, we sought to reinforce the positive of who our kids are, who God made them to be. We'll often talk through the fact that God did not make us a mistake. In making them in the sex that they are. We've discussed how God's design is for men and women to be in romantic relationships with one another. But.

And this is how we try to communicate it biblically to our kids is that. No, it's sin that is distorting this. It's the enemy that's distorting this view of many in our culture where they believe that they know better than God's design. So a verse that we continue to go back to here is Genesis in Genesis 1, where it says, so God created mankind in his own image. In the image of God, he created them.

Male and female. He created them. So just trying to equip our kids with truth, knowing that this isn't just Mommy and Daddy just coming up with something. But no, this is from the Lord Foundation. Yeah.

And I have a funny story. I mean, it was funny to me. This is a few years ago. So the kids were a lot younger. And this was before we told them about this topic.

It was October, so the Lord was being really kind to me in that regard. We were going through a drive through and a boy was dressed like a girl. Full makeup, eyelashes, blue hair, the whole thing. And the kids asked why that boy was dressed like a girl. And I nervously said something along the lines of, he must be doing it because it's Halloween.

I was so afraid to tell them the real answer. Good job. But I knew then that it was time to start introducing this topic in an age appropriate way again. They were really young. So then we did what Taylor just said.

We pulled out some scripture, we spoke to their identity, and then we just explained to them that these people, though they are walking in sin, are people that we need to pray for and have a sensitivity towards them and not judge them. Sure. And one verse that I don't. First Corinthians 6.

A few of them. Yeah.

Wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God. Do not be deceived. The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord and the Lord for the body. By his power, God raised the Lord from the dead and he will raise us also. Amen.

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body. But whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God. You are not your own.

You are bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies. One thing I'll add at the end here, just kind of Reinforcing what we've said is that, like, we're allowing the Holy Spirit to lead us as to what's an age appropriate detail to share with our kids in any of these topics. And so with this, like, what we've just shared, that's where we believe that the Lord has led us of no, this is what's age appropriate for your kids and establishing the foundation of that. Now they're 10 and 11, so this conversation will change as it.

As they get older. But for right now, we're establishing that foundation of identity in them and who the Lord created them to be. Praise God. Amen. Taylor and Steph are people that we highly respect, by the way, some of the most committed people in the faith.

I don't know how you guys do what you do. Y' all run hard and you love so deep. And I'm telling you something right now. When I. We gave them this topic of sex and sexuality, I was like, they are gonna crush it.

Because I know how intentional that they are with their children. And I'm telling you guys, have a conversation, conversation with them, side stage, so to speak. And you will be blown away about the things that they've done and are doing because they care about how this gets rolled out to their family. So, man, kudos to you guys. Seriously, the resources.

So, okay, I'm gonna double barrel a couple questions for you guys because this is a biggie. All right? Most of the people in the Young Family's ministry grew up in the 90s. If you grew up in the 90s, raise your hand. Just out of curiosity.

Whoa. Like almost everybody in here. Okay, so. And there just wasn't the same access to technology that there was today. So.

I remember when 3D came out. Dude, that's insane. So how have you guys protected the boundaries of screen time and technology in your house? Now? I'm going to follow up with another question here in a second.

So let's start with this one though. How have you protected the boundaries? What's it look like? It's a doozy. It's really funny because I'm like trying to get a landline put into our house and Gian works with AI, so that kind of gives you the scope of where we're at.

That is hysterical. He hasn't agreed yet, but I will. I'll kind of let him share because I feel like we are really balanced household when it comes to this. I feel like obviously we live in a technology driven world, so there really is no escaping it. When we moved from California Just about two years ago.

And this is just an honest story that I feel like I think you didn't know until last week we don't have a tv. And Gian thought we just didn't have a TV because I was being a tyrant and didn't want my kids just sitting down and, you know, watching tv. But before we moved, I just wasn't in the best place mentally. I was working full time, raising four kids, all the things that you can think of. And when I would get home from work, I didn't want to see my kids.

It was like, go watch tv. Just let me unwind and let me disconnect. And the TV became a crutch for me personally. And when we moved, the Holy Spirit very so softly yet Stern, said, you are to not bring a TV into your home until I say so.

Because I know myself, I know how easy it is. I know that our kids can be exhausting. I know the amount of overstimulation that they can bring us. And sometimes you just want a breather. And it's so easy to be like, here's a device.

Just give me a minute. But also, the Holy Spirit reminded me, these are the children I gave to you. It is not the responsibility of a device of a church or of a distraction to raise the children I entrusted you. Come on. So that's why we don't have a tv.

It's not because, you know, I'm trying to go back to Laura Ingalls time, but it really is because the Lord is doing a work in me and my husband. He'll tell you a little bit about that. So I would just say, just for us, we don't allow. We have one shared iPad, we have one switch, and I have a laptop. All of those are checked into our rooms.

The children are not allowed to be on them without permission. If my son would like to game, he games out in the open. There is no door closed. I need to know who he's talking to, because my kids are my responsibility. Bingo.

I. I know that. Again, we live in a world where it's so easy to just give them access, but you don't know who's on the other side. That's exactly that game. And it's. It's nobody else's job to raise your kids.

And so for us, like I said, we don't have a tv. We have a projector, which is amazing, and we watch a movie on Fridays. Our kids do some work online, but again, it's highly, highly monitored. I have to be able to see what they're seeing. And that's my.

Yeah, well, at the same token, I like she mentioned, I work in like marketing, advertising and AI is like everywhere. And it's 100% on what I do on the day to day. And so I'm pretty knowledgeable of what is happening in that world. And it's moving at the speed of sound times 100. It's actually kind of crazy to think about.

And when me and Naomi moved here and to her point on the no tv, we just chose to be hyper intentional about what we want our family to be like and setting boundaries, which kind of looks crazy, right? People come over to visit the house and they're like, where's the game? What is this? It's like, sorry bro, I don't have one. Go outside.

Yeah, go outside. Yeah, yeah. And it's, it's, it's funny but you know, it's obviously a deeply personal conviction that my wife has. And so my job as her husband is a supporter and to say, okay babe, it may not be forever. If anybody wants to gift us a tv, we'll take it.

And I'm just kidding.

You could not wait to say that I was holding that one in the whole time, guys. No, but, but really, like, you know, we're being hyper intentional with what we want our family to look like and what we want our kids to be exposed to. Like I said, like our oldest is 12 and you feel like he's like, you know, 12 going on 24. It's going so fast. And the, the reality is, is that, you know, he's gonna have the rest of his life to grow up and being at a 12 year old boy who wants to sit and draw and play with his 9 year old or 8 year old sister with sticks outside in the bag.

Go knock yourself out, man. Have a good time. Yeah, do it. You're going to have the ability to play on the Internet and it's going to be part of what the future is going to look like. But right now we're being hyper intentional as parents to set boundaries.

And again, it kind of sounds crazy to the world and to everybody else, but for us it's working and it's what God asked us to do. So no judgment on if you have a TV or not. But, but for us specifically, we're just being hyper obedient to what God calls us. Come on. Amen.

Okay, so let's stay with you for a second. Browns will come back to you in a second here. What would you say to Parents in this room and listening to this podcast later on who feel like they don't know how to break the addiction to screens for their kids and devices that their kids may be struggling with. What can they do? What would you say to them?

We actually, I feel so bad we have had scriptures to give to you guys and I just haven't been been mentioning them. But I will mention this one that the Lord gave to us. It's found in Proverbs 13:4 and the ESV. It says the soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied. I don't want to be a sluggard.

I feel like with the, the move of technology and let's be honest, it's an addiction now I think one question that I will pose to you is if your children are struggling with this addiction, what does your relationship with technology look like? That's the first thing I'm going to ask is what is modeled in your home? Are your kids seeing you face to face in a conversation at the dinner table when you go out to eat, are you on your phone? Because more is more is caught than taught. And so I feel like for us we again we are pretty hyper vigilant when it comes to screens.

But I mean when you go home tonight, look on your iPhone and see how much your screen report is saying. That's the first thing that I would post you. But there's a book I want to recommend and I cannot recommend this book enough. It's called the Anxious Generation. I think there's a slide for this.

But this book talks about how technology is rewiring our kids brains and the statistics in here of, I mean they're just, they're so mind blowing of one I think we read something it was like 72% of like 2 year olds already have an iPad had. I mean so you're, you're giving, we're giving our kids early addictions. And so I would say if you don't know what to do, you have to bring the holy Spirit in. It's just a non negotiable. You have to bring him in and you have to model it.

Even if it's something as simple as starting with no phones at the dinner table. When you go out to eat at a restaurant, make them a busy bag. Tell them to bring something to draw, tell them to bring something to play with. Like and if you need other people to hold you accountable, I will hold you accountable. I have a friend that has a lockbox.

She Literally will put her phone in a box and a timer goes on. You can get them on Amazon. You set a timer and your phone is locked in that box until the timer goes off. I mean we are at the age now where that's what we have to do because the addiction is so real. I mean you look at the move of social media and how, you know, the amount of young girls aren't already happy with the way their bodies look because of so, because of the freedom and the access that they have.

So my encouragement to you as a parent is want to just invite the holy spirit in and to do even just a self check of what, what am I modeling, modeling to my children regarding technology. And I think even Gian had mentioned or he'll talk a little bit more about just teaching yourself and all the new things. Absolutely. I think one last point on that is, you know, we have to be intentional with our own learnings. I think it's okay to have beliefs on what this, you know, what the world is like, what technology means to, to you and your family.

But I do think it's a responsibility of parents to take one hour out of the month, not even the day, not of the week, take one hour of the month and just learn, take, watch a YouTube video, learn a little bit about what is actually happening with this stuff and just be made aware. I think it's an investment that you're doing to make sure that you're going to understand and look for all the areas that the enemy can come in and just be a self learner in this aspect. Not because you need to be a crazy AI person, but you need to understand where this world is going and how to defend your family against it. And so I think that's just, you know, if you guys walk away with any takeaways or any homework, just spend one hour and research it, learn it. So now you know how to protect your kids against it.

That's good. I would say even delay, delay use and delay getting them like the gaming devices and the iPads and all of that. If you delay it from the beginning, you have a better opportunity to capture their attention and to lay that foundation of like well, case in point. Our son was like, do you know that so and so has a TV in his bedroom? And I'm like so happy for him.

That's so wonderful. Why don't I have a TV in my bedroom? Oh, because I care about your melatonin production and I also want you to have good stuff sleep and I don't trust the TV. And he's like, when I'm 18, can I have a TV? And I'm like, that's always how it ends when I'm 18.

But as for me, in this household, you won't have a TV in your bedroom. All right, Taylor and Steph and guys, we're going to be wrapping up here shortly. We're going to go over just by a few minutes. But Taylor and Steph, quickly, can you guys talk to us about how you guys are developing your sons into a healthy view and respect for women biblically? And then, Steph, what does it look like for you as you're teaching your daughter about body image and the comparison traps that society sets for them?

Yeah. So starting with my sons, first off, it starts with me, with this. I need to lead by example. So with my relationship with the Lord, a verse that I just hold fast to is Matthew 5:8, which is, blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Amen.

So I need to guard my heart, I need to guard my mind, I need to guard my soul as I lead my kids. So with that, that's where it starts. And then specifically talking about respecting women, it starts in the home. With that, I regularly voice my love and affection and honor of Stephanie to my kids. And from front of my kids when I mess up, I apologize to Stephanie and to my kids for how I mess up in front of them and did not honor my wife in front of them.

And with that, too, I made it clear, like, we all love our kids, right? So I tell my kids I love them all the time, but I also tell them that I love Stephanie. Like, there's tears to this. And so with that, I make sure that they're well aware of just my affection and my commitment to Stephanie. And then with that, I hold them accountable.

I do not tolerate disrespect of my wife from my kids. I will tell them that is my wife you're talking to, not just your mom. Yes, sir. And so I hold them accountable to that. And that.

I mean, that involves honoring her with their words, their actions, and their deeds, like, what they're doing. But I have also talked with my son just about what it looks like in our role as men, and he's a man in training as leaders and protectors. And with that, like, we're called to help and not hurt others, specifically women, and how this can practically look little things like holding the door for someone not being the first to jump in line, but allowing ladies to go first or never being rough with a Girl while he's horsing around. So basic chivalry, manners stuff that's, I feel like expired right now. It's not dead, my friend.

Bring it back. So, yeah. Hallelujah, Steph. Yeah. So talking to Winnie about body image and comparison traps, it started for me when she was very little, just telling her how beautiful she is and speaking to her identity as a girl.

Psalm 139, verses 13 through 14. In Jeremiah 1:5 are verses I speak to both Winnie and Darren often. But Psalm 139, for you created my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Your works are wonderful. I know that full well. And Jeremiah 1:5, before I formed you in the womb, I knew you before you were born. I set you apart. I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.

Side note, this would be an excellent opportunity to talk to your little kids about what's a womb. That's true. Okay, Sorry. But as Winnie grows up and, well, she's 11, she's about to be 12, but as she's been growing up, she started carrying a lot more about what she looks like. And, you know, so I have been trying really hard to affirm her in her natural beauty and remind her that her worth isn't in her looks, but who God made her to be.

I remind her about who she is, is, and what her identity is and that God didn't make two of her for a reason and that he loves her just the way she was made. And then a book that we just started is the ultimate girl's body book. Yeah, we have a. It's up there. We just started going through this, but so far I can recommend it.

And this is just a great resource for young girls entering puberty. And so we are currently looking for resources for boys. So if you have any recommendations, that'd be awesome. By the way, speaking of which, if you are out there or listening to this recording at a later time and you have a phenomenal resource that you're like, oh, have you read this? Please tell us about it.

You can send an email to young families@therealFuge.net and tell us about it because you know what we can do, we can help put it into help in the hands of other people who are living that life right now. Maybe you've already done this part of your journey. You're like, man, did you ever read Baby Wise? I love Baby Wise Man. That helped me get through the sleepless nights with my Kids, it's amazing.

Those are simple ideas. So we're going to land this plane here in just a second, but we have got to talk about a very uncomfortable topic for just a second. So Keanu's. It is uncomfortable, but online sexual predators are always seeking to traffic and recruit minors from popular chat rooms, gaming situations. Are there any resources that you can point us to as families that might be worried about sexual exploitation or even teenage grooming?

What would you say? Does anybody know one of the most predominant indicators that maybe a child or a teenager might be prey for a predator? Tell us. Anybody know the lack of a father?

So Gian's going to kind of take this one because his mom actually was worked in child crimes and trafficking for LAPD for years. And so that's kind of where I got a lot of my information. But that's one of the top indicators of what they go for. Children that do not have a present father in active and in the home are. Are prey.

Wow. They are easy to manipulate because they can be wooed. They can be, you know, just. When you have a girl in particular who doesn't have a dad in the home, you're gonna crave that admonishment, and you're gonna crave the admiration and the affirming. And so predators will tell you that's one of the number one indicators of what they go for.

If I see. See that there is not a present father in the home or an active father who knows what is going on with the child. They're the easiest phrase. So Gian's going to touch on some of those resources. Come on.

All right. Yes, an uncomfortable topic, but absolutely necessary. Again, the Internet has amazing things about it, but also has really dark corners of it. And so, you know, it'd be ignorant to not talk to you guys about this and just act like this doesn't happen. And so our job, and again, is to embrace the uncomfortable and the awkwardness and show you and tell you, you know, practical ways for you guys to, you know, protect your household and protect your kids.

And so, yeah, Naomi mentioned it, so my mom led. They called it, actually the ICAC unit at the LAPD for, like, 20 years. And it's the Internet. Crimes against children. And so growing up, you would hear and see crazy stories, things that you would only see on the news, you'd only see on Netflix documentaries.

You think that's not going to happen to you, not going to happen to anybody in your community, but it actually happens every day. And people, again, it's easy to Live in a perfect world where you don't look at that and you don't want to believe that, but the reality is that it is real and that, you know, anybody who's online, especially young kids that are unsupervised, have they, you know, they have the ability to be tailored into chat rooms or to things to pop up, you know, unannounced. And, you know, it's very important for you guys, as your parents, as parents, and as, you know, guardians of these kids to set boundaries. Again, that's a big word that we're going to say time and time again is boundaries. Not only with family, not only with spiritual boundaries, but, you know, digital boundaries, meaning logins, meaning the computer is out in the public place with the whole family.

You know, even for us, we have one shared computer for our family, one shared computer for our kids. And, you know, it's hyper vigilant. When they have social media and when they have access to phones, you got to be very specific with what apps are, are being downloaded. And no kid should have access to private chat rooms without your knowledge. That's right.

And, or password or any of that, really. And so, you know, I remember growing up and hearing these stories from my mom and seeing some of these crazy things as I started to, you know, have my own kids and ask these questions. And. And it really is, you know, evil in this world that is attacking your family. And right now, there's no better time than literally tonight on a Wednesday night to make sure that when you go home after church, you are looking vigorously through the history on your computers, looking through, you know, password protection sites things, and that you want to be overly cautious.

This is not something that you want to just kind of set it and forget it, you hear, in one year and not the other. Like, my challenge and my ask to you is to go home and do something about it and to really dial, dial in the protection and the digital boundaries for your kids and for your family. Yes. Yeah. Come on.

Just one thing to add. Like Roblox and Discord. Those are two. A lot of the kids use Discord. A lot of the kids use Discord for gaming.

And Roblox has been known countless times to house tons of thousands of predators. And so if you know that, again, go home and be hyper vigilant. But again, I cannot encourage you enough. You, you have to have the Holy Spirit. I just.

We can raise kids with Jesus and, and knowing the word of God, but there's something that you, you cannot get away with parenting. Fulfill, like fully without the presence of the Holy Spirit. I cannot tell you how many times growing up as a kid, I. Or even as a teenager and a young adult, that I was at a place where I shouldn't have been. And my mom would text me or call me and be like, I don't know where you're at, but the Holy Spirit woke me up.

Come on. I've had this happen already, twice with our son, Milo. He loves to draw, and he is an amazing animator. And I have had two times where, again, it happens. I have forgotten to grab the switch and to check it in at night.

And his sound machine sounds like an airplane's taking off, so I can't hear anything once he goes to bed. But I've had. I've had two particular times since living here where the Holy Spirit says, go to his room. And I have walked in his room and I have caught him twice. Of course, it was just.

Just looking up, drawing videos, you know, like. And I was like, I'm so thankful for the Holy Spirit. Come on. Again. We can have, you know, all of the boundaries and, you know, do all of the research, but we need to have the Holy Spirit when it comes to our parenting.

Hallelujah. We just have to. Because he is the helper that is there when we can't be. And he is going to wake you up in the middle of the night. He is going to send you a dream.

He is going to guide you and expose the things that shouldn't be there. Because the enemy is very active in this generation. And he's active because we, as parents are distracted. Yeah. And so if we can remove ourselves from being so distracted, I feel like we're going to have a newfound sensitivity to the Holy Spirit and to his leadings when it comes to raising our children.

Amen. Guys, we're going to close this out tonight with one more slide. We have some good friends over at the Lantern Project. Can you put that QR code up there? If you have any device, iPhone, MacBook, Apple TV, Fire Stick, Chromebook, Chromecast, Kindle Fire, Nintendo 3DS, Nintendo Switch, PlayStation 4, PS5, Xbox, Roku, wireless routers, smart TVs, any of that.

Our friends at the Leonard Project, what they do is equip parents and families with, how do you lock down this device? How do I make it safe again? Like Naomi just said, just take the stupid thing away. But the reality is, I also know that we can't live in a bubble. Your kid, as Gian said, the Internet is here to stay.

It's not going to go anywhere. So we need to learn how to protect our children. They are our responsibility. It is our job to. To raise the next generation.

So I wanted to equip you. Please tell me if this does not work, this QR code. It does. Awesome. So I will send it out.

I can send it out. The point I'm trying to make, though, is you can go to lanternproject.net and there are people in this church who have phenomenal contacts and are trained on a lot of the details. And I'm telling you, we have got to take the journey of protecting our children so seriously. It cannot be somebody else's job, because TikTok YouTube, they'll gladly raise your kids. And you know what will end up happening is the devil will be glad to escort them right into a life of destruction.

He'll be happy to do that. And it's our job to say, absolutely not. Not on my watch. Not on your watch. Grandparents, great grandparents and parents.

It's our job. It's our responsibility. I know you had some thoughts as well. I was just praying about ending the night earlier this afternoon. And I am so grateful for the foundation that was laid with these past two weeks.

Talking about everything from breaking off spiritual curses and establishing boundaries within your home, strong willed children, everything concerning about the LGBTQ sex culture that's after our children. And then, you know, everything that Naomi and Gian touched on as far as blended families, online security and safety. And it wasn't just to have a really fun switch up in the schedule and have a different format of Wednesday night, but it was to equip the people that are sitting here with us about how the enemy is after the next generation, how he's after school, splitting up the family unit. He's hiding in plain sight. He's not even hiding anymore.

He's like, this is just how I'm gonna do it. And now we have been given the charge of the ways that we are going to protect our families that are gonna protect our nieces and nephews. Whether you don't have children in this room, our children, our grandchildren. Exposing the lies of the enemies, exposing his tactics is the way that we're going to equip, equip the believers that are sitting here in this room. So as I was praying into this night, I just saw the people that were sitting in this room.

Whether you're walking through the season of raising your family and this resonates with you, and you're like, yes. Oh, my gosh. This is how I was Taught. But this is how I see how. Where I have conviction or yes, I want to touch on that.

If you need freedom in any area, all of our leaders are going to be available for prayer. But more importantly, the people that are sitting here in this room are the ones that truly want to grow deeper and disciple with the Lord. And this is more or less the training ground for the war that's outside of this building, outside of these four walls. And even for the people that come in on the Sunday morning, the people that walked into the refuge for the first time just because our website popped up, up in their Google search, the amount of people that have filtered through our ministry just this year that are brand new, the impact that we are making is not just to have another really cool community group or to have fun date nights, but it's to equip the families of the refuge of no, this is what the Bible says. This is what true discipleship is.

So I saw this night ending as a time of intercession and prayer. For if it's you and your family and you're walking through something and you, you need prayer for, there's freedom here tonight. But interceding for the people that are going to come through this church, interceding for our schools that our, that our children wouldn't be taught about, you know, pronouns and that you can be, you know, Kevin if you're Sally or, you know, all of that nonsense, going after our schools, going after the next generation and saying like, I see you devil, but I raise you you. I raise you the truth. So I see tonight ending in a night of intercession and prayer.

We're gonna. I want you guys, if you don't mind, if everyone could just stand up to their feet. We were gonna have everyone come forward, but for the sake of time, we're actually just gonna have a chance just to stay right where you're at. And we are gonna pray over you. And I want you, if you're with your spouse, I want you to join hands.

I want us to pray together for our families, pray over the next generation, pray over the fact that God has entrusted this generation, these folks who are alive right now, with an opportunity to live, to see. The Lord is going to do an incredible work with a generation that is being lied to left and right. But when those people, people say, no, I will not choose lies. I will choose the anchor of my soul and his name is Jesus Christ. What can change?

So many things can change. So, Holy Spirit, we just come to you tonight as your sons and Daughters and Father, as the stewards of the one that you have put into our life, each child, whether it's a birth child, a foster child, if it's a relationship, if it's a spiritual son or daughter, God, we have been entrusted to lead. So Holy Spirit, we are asking you, would you teach us, Teach us, teach us. Lord, we need your wisdom. We need your guidance, we need your understanding.

We need your discipline and your discernment. Holy Spirit, we need you. Father, I ask you right now over every. Every child in this room, in the building. Father.

Refuge kids, Lord, Every child in Cabarrus County, Mecklenburg County, Iredell County, God, Rowan County, Father, all the surrounding areas. Those who are going through elementary school and middle school and high school, Father, we know they are the future. They are the ones who are going to inherit this whole thing. God, for generation Z, for Gen Alpha, the ones right now who are being contested. The enemy wants so badly to steal their identity.

Father, we just say in the name of Jesus, no, you cannot have their freedom. You cannot have their mind. You cannot have their understanding. They will fear the Lord. We call things that are not yet as though they are.

You will walk in freedom. Gen Z, you will be suicide free. Gen Z and Gen A, you will walk and you will declare the righteous deeds of God and your name, Lord Jesus will be on their lips. It will be in our homes, it'll be at our dinner tables. It'll be in the rooms as we tuck our kids in for bed.

We'll talk about you when we rise, when we go along the road, when we come home for dinner, we will talk about you all the time. God, it's biblical discipline that matters. It's truth that will stand the test of time. Holy Spirit, we need you and we just say Jesus, we are asking for unity in our church around this topic of these sons and daughters you've entrusted us to. Father, would you give us conviction over things?

Put your finger on us, Holy Spirit. We were reminded tonight by Jeanne and Naomi what's the example that we're setting. How many times do we death scroll all day long? We don't even realize we're setting the example for what's okay in our own house. Father, give us conviction because it leads us to repentance.

Lord, I pray in Jesus name that this would not be a condemnation, but this would be an urging of we have to wake up, we have to go to the wall and be watched. Jesus, help us to take our proper places as mothers and fathers, as the ones who are entrusted to guide this next generation. I speak as the priest of my own home. God as the father over my own children. I just say a blessing.

Thank you, God, for them. Thank you, God, that they will live in godly homes, they will have godly children of their own. And they will establish a biblical precedent of Jesus first. Jesus over everything. Father, let us live a life that's worthy of the one you laid down to redeem us.

Help us, Jesus. Lord, I thank you and I speak a blessing, God, over these families tonight. Here, Father, under the sound of my voice. Father, I thank you, Jesus. I say, the Lord sees you and he remembers you.

May he equip every mother and every father with understanding. And may he guide and honor those who fear the Lord, young and old, great and small. And may the Lord richly bless you, parents, grandparents, great grandparents and your children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. And may the name of Jesus be written upon upon your hearts. And may he be glorified in your homes.

In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen. Amen. I want to give a thanks to Taylor and Stephanie over here on my left and to Naomi and Gian. Give it up for these guys tonight.

So thankful. Last word that you have. If you were not here last week and you want a copy of Training up the Next Generation, please come and see us. We have extra copies. We're so grateful for the opportunity to have taken over Wednesday night service.

Thank you, Pastor Jay and Mel. Be blessed tonight, you guys. Thank you. Be blessed, everybody.